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ICF and National Board Certified Holistic Life & Wellness Coach
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You are not "starting over".
I think this is one of the biggest misconceptions we have about life's transitions.
When someone gets laid off, they often feel like they're back at square one. When a marriage ends, it can feel like all those years were somehow "wasted."
When we retire, move across the country, or watch our youngest child leave for college, it's easy to wonder who we are now.
But here's what I believe:
You're not leaving with empty hands.
You're bringing every lesson you've learned, every mistake you've survived, every skill you've developed, every boundary you've practiced, every relationship that shaped you, and every ounce of resilience you've earned along the way.
You're bringing wisdom, experience, and courage.
You're bringing a version of yourself that knows things your younger self couldn't possibly have known.
That's not starting over.
That's starting from experience.
In this week's episode of Beyond the Type, I share seven questions I often ask coaching clients who are navigating life's biggest transitions, whether that's a career change, divorce, retirement, becoming an empty nester, grief, or simply wondering what comes next.
One of my favorites is this:
What do you want to take with you?
Sometimes the answer changes everything.
🎧 Listen to the latest episode of Beyond the Type. Link in bio.
#lifetransitions #changes #startingover #motivationalquotesoftheday
4 days ago
There are seven questions I ask my clients when they're going through a transition.
Career change. Divorce. Empty nest. Losing someone they love.
And there's one question that almost everyone skips - not because it's hard, but because we're so eager to move on that we forget to do it.
It's this:
What needs to be honored before you move forward?
Even good endings deserve our attention. Even the chapter you're relieved to close had something worth acknowledging.
I invite you to try this. Before you rush into what's next, take a moment. What deserves gratitude? What deserves recognition?
The full list of seven questions is in the latest episode of Beyond the Type. Link in bio.
#transitions #lifetransitions #change #gratitude
5 days ago
I hear this a lot.
From clients who are waiting. Waiting for the conversation that never came. The apology that isn't coming. The explanation that would finally make it all make sense.
And they are putting their entire next chapter on hold, waiting for something that may never arrive.
And I get it. The desire for closure is so human. We want things to feel finished. Tied up. Resolved.
But here's what I've learned, both in my own life and in hundreds of coaching conversations:
Closure is rarely handed to you.
Most of the time, you have to create it yourself.
And that can look like a lot of different things.
It can look like writing a letter you'll never send, getting every single thing out of your head and onto paper (without editing!), and without wondering how it will land. Because no one is going to read it. It's for you.
It can look like a ritual: make it something simple, something physical. One last walk through the old neighborhood. Erasing the whiteboard on your last day. Rearranging the furniture. Washing your hands, literally, and feeling the water, and deciding that was the moment.
Closure doesn't require the other person.
It doesn't require a perfect ending, and it doesn't require complete and total understanding of everything that happened.
It just requires a decision: A decision that you are done waiting for permission to begin again.
You can grieve what didn't get resolved. You can hold space for the messy, unfinished parts. And you can still choose to close the cover on that chapter and set it down.
Both things can be true.
Where are you waiting for closure that you might actually need to create for yourself?
🎧 I'm talking about this in the latest episode of Beyond the Type, including a few simple ways to create your own closure during a life transition. Link in bio or find wherever you listen to podcasts.
#lifetransitions #personalgrowth #closure #findingclosure
7 days ago
Every time I move, I find boxes that have apparently traveled with me for years.
Completely unopened.
At some point I have to ask: if I haven't needed this in a decade, does it really need to come to the next place?
Life transitions ask us similar questions. And those questions get a lot less tangible:
- What beliefs are you carrying that no longer fit?
- What expectations can finally be released?
- What old identities are ready to be set down?
Maybe it's the belief that your job title determines your worth.
Maybe it's the story that you're too old to start something new.
(I launched my coaching career at 47, so.)
Maybe it's guilt.
Maybe it's perfectionism.
Not everything deserves to make the trip.
🎧 The latest episode of Beyond the Type is all about how to navigate life's biggest transitions. Link in bio or wherever you listen to podcasts.
#transitions #change #lifetransitions #startingover #personalgrowth
1 week ago
Many of my clients grew up people-pleasing as a means of survival.
For some, it meant keeping the peace in a family that was always emotionally, verbally, or physically turbulent.
For others, it meant belonging.
We carry patterns into our adulthood, and sometimes it's the only way we know how to move through the world.
These patterns once served you extremely well - they kept you safe and got you what you needed at the time.
Perhaps they need a rest.
What does it look like to honor that part of you and send it compassion - instead of judging that part of you?
Be kind to yourself, as you would a dear friend. 💗
#selfworth #selfcompassion #peoplepleasing
1 week ago
I've been thinking about crabs lately. 🦀
No, not THOSE kids of crabs...!😬😬😬
Cancer season is represented by the crab, and crabs move sideways. That's the most natural, efficient way for them to move. They don't waste energy trying to move like fish, or birds, or humans with five-year plans and color-coded calendars.
Meanwhile, we live in a culture that constantly asks:
What's next?
What's your goal?
What are you building?
What should you be doing right now?
And while there's nothing wrong with ambition or growth, I wonder if we've forgotten that not every season asks the same thing from us.
Maybe some seasons are for moving forward.
And maybe some seasons are for resting, reflecting, integrating, and tending to what we already have.
Sideways movement is still movement.
If you've been feeling slower, more emotional, more nostalgic, or more interested in sitting on the porch than conquering the world this summer, perhaps there's nothing wrong with you. Maybe you're exactly where you need to be.
I talk more about this (and about my unexpected obsession with crabs) in this week's episode of Beyond the Type. Link in Bio.
I'm curious:
What does your current season of life seem to be asking of you right now?
#cancerseason #crabs #resting #summer #enneagram #permission #beyondthetype #podcast
2 weeks ago
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