ICF and National Board Certified Holistic Life & Wellness Coach

Tag: self-care

Funerals and Rituals

Funerals and Rituals

Funerals and rituals. I watched some of Queen Elizabeth II’s funeral and procession this morning.  I’m not a “royalphile” by any means, but I got sucked into the pageantry and tradition. Everything seemed so perfectly orchestrated.  Every move rehearsed, down to the pallbearer’s hand and…

Being Heard with Autoimmune Disease: CQ, CQ, CQ…

Being Heard with Autoimmune Disease: CQ, CQ, CQ…

“CQ, CQ, CQ…”  these letters ring in my head, a familiar mantra that echoed up from the basement, where my dad’s amateur radio shack lived. I remember his muffled voice coming up through the floorboards, and sometimes coming over the tv or radio in loud,…

What if there was no tomorrow?

What if there was no tomorrow?

“Well, what if there is no tomorrow? There wasn’t one today.”

— Phil Connors, Groundhog Day


I’m writing this on February 2nd (aka Groundhog Day here in the states).

I’m also watching the movie “Groundhog Day” starring Bill Murray.

For those poor unfortunate souls who have not seen the film, it’s the story of Phil Conners (Bill Murray), a weatherman who has to visit a small town in Pennsylvania to film a segment on whether or not Puxatawny Phil, the infamous groundhog, sees his shadow. If he does see his shadow, this signals six more weeks of winter (if he doesn’t see his shadow, early spring!).

Traditions sure are strange…

But, I digress. Back to our regularly scheduled program:

The movie turns comedic – and a little tragic – when Phil (the weatherman, not the groundhog), tucked into his cozy bed and breakfast, wakes up each morning over and over again only to discover it’s the same day – February 2nd, Groundhog Day.

He is forced to repeat this day until he gets it right.

When he realizes what is happening, Phil (who is a bit of a jerk) sees this as a golden opportunity to do whatever the hell he wants:  punch an annoying classmate in the face, steal money out of the back of a truck, get a girl in bed, etc…. without having to suffer any consequences. Sounds like a perfect world!

He forces and pushes himself (and others) to the extreme to try to create outcomes in his favor.

Phil then realizes that while he can do anything he wants, he can’t get anything he truly wants.

He doesn’t control as much as he thought, despite most everything every day being pretty much the same over and over again.  He starts thinking:

What if this never ends?  What if I am doomed to repeat this day… forever?


Then, Phil wakes up one day (yep, still February 2nd for the bazillionth day in a row) and has an epiphany:

What if this never ends…?

If this cycle never ends, what can be done to make things the most… comfortable? Enjoyable? Not only for him, but for everyone around him?

How does one learn to live again, in this “new normal”? To have fun, to work, to play, despite the fact that tomorrow will never come?

All of this preamble is to say:  I have seen many of my clients dealing with autoimmune disease have this same epiphany.


When dealing with chronic illness we can easily get mired in the details of outcomes.  We strive for perfect health, we fight to get back to where we were when we weren’t sick.

Or we pretend that “well it doesn’t matter, I’m sick anyway, so I’m gonna keep doing XYZ, nothing’s ever gonna change”.

How does one learn to accept and live in a “new normal”, in a life that we didn’t necessarily sign up for?

Accepting “what is” sure is hard. But it’s also the key to regaining our health – and creating comfort and enjoyment again.  Might not be exactly what we had planned, but, then again, what does ever turn out exactly as we plan?

What if everything were just as it should be, right here, right now?


To be clear, this is not about giving up. This is about acceptance and the ability to choose how you want to respond to your current circumstances, and pivot when the time is right.

After he accepted his current state of affairs, Phil eventually chose to be kind instead of his usual jerky shadowy self.  Only then, after this acceptance and his being kind – not only to others but himself – did the day on the calendar finally change.

And he always had the power in him all along to make this choice.

What are your thoughts on acceptance and the power of choice? If any of this resonates with you, feel free to let me know.

Til next time,

Sandy


I would love to be a support to you if you are looking to make either big or little shifts in your life. As your coach, I will listen deeply, offer empathy, and help you make sense of what’s going on in your life right now.  We can talk about anything that’s on your mind:

  • accepting what is
  • creating balance in your life
  • working through emotions of grief, sadness, or loss
  • helping you create structure in your life and a plan moving forward – whatever that may mean to you
  • help you regain control if you are feeling out of control
  • letting go of perfectionism when it comes to your health
  • how best to manage stress and anxiety
  • creating boundaries with family, friends, and co-workers
  • giving yourself permission to just be – no matter where you are in your life.

To book your Complimentary “Meet & Greet” Session and Assessment, click here.


Sandy Swanson is a Certified Functional Health Coach (A-CFHC) and a National Board Certified Health and Wellness Coach (NBC-HWC).  You can learn more about her here and more about what coaching is here.


PS: No, I did not take the photo above, and yes, it’s probably a yellow-bellied marmot, not a groundhog. 

Anger: Six Things To Consider

Anger: Six Things To Consider

Anger!!! Who here is angry?! About anything. The election, the fact your spouse never takes out the trash when you ask them to, that those damn kids won’t get off your lawn…ARGH!!! Recently there was a flood of emails between myself and other family members…

Self-care. WTF is it?

Self-care. WTF is it?

This is part of my “one thing” series.  Other posts in this series can be found here. If there’s one thing you should do during the pandemic, it’s to figure out your self-care routine. People are realizing the need for self-care during this uncertain time…